So, now that I’m 30 (and had a few days to adjust to being 30), I figured it was time for one of those thoughtful, retrospective, personal blog posts. After all, 30 is such a BIG, ROUND number with a 0 at the end of it (like 50, or 100, or 2000, only not as ancient *grin*).
I enjoy getting older. No, really, I do. Some people might have worn their youth well, but I was not one of them. I was painfully shy and overly cautious as a teenager and a young woman. It was hard for me to to open up, reach out. In my 20s, I began to be more comfortable in my own skin and found firmer footing. They were a decade of great changes. I graduated from college, got married, had three kids. I wrote three (and a quarter) novels, a whole slew of stories, and many many false starts. I tried new things–baking bread, making jam, playing piano–little enough things, but every new thing I dared to fail at eroded the walls of the “But I can’t do this” prison I had built around myself. That’s perfectionism for you. I loosened up and had fun. I put myself out there a little—in submitting stories (and garnering stacks of virtual kindly-worded rejections), in blog posts, pictures.
I taught my oldest kid to read. Somehow, that’s the most mind-blowing thing of all.
And now I’m 30, and looking forward to the next season of life. My youngest will be 2 this summer (no longer a baby, *sigh*) and the time for diapers and naps is slowly giving way to schoolbooks, messy art, summer camps and science experiments. My interests have broadened in so many ways and I am freer to explore them , either independently or alongside my family.
I love to make plans, but I have also learned what happens to the best-laid plans (and be okay with that—generally), so, no, I don’t have a Things To Accomplish Before 40 Plan. I want to keep writing, keep learning, keep growing. I want to model exercising my mind, enthusiasm for trying new things, perseverance, and courage to my little ones. I want to stop living for the opinions of people I hardly know (or who matter little to me). It’s a road I’m traveling, and the destination is a long way away, but, in the meantime, it’s good to take off my shoes and enjoy the flowers!