I always approach New Year’s resolutions with a great deal of caution. It’s so easy to get swept up in the frenzy of goal-making (that has be done by NYE, or else you lose that magical window of time or something) and overreach. Two mistakes I’ve made setting yearly goals in the past are:
1. Not being flexible enough. Often I’ve started the year off convinced that my big writing project should be “Shepherdesses in Saskatoon”, when, really, by June I’m starting to suspect I’d be better off working on “The Lovelorn Laundress”. Or perhaps my enthusiasm for creating illuminated letters has waned and I’d rather be crocheting snowflakes.
Sometimes my goals live me no wiggle room in terms of time. “Write a novel in a month” might be doable for some people–including many many NaNoWriMo winners *grin*–but realistically? It’s not good goal for a homeschooling mom of three who’s trying to sell her house, and likes her sleep and her husband, thank you very much.
2. Taking giant leaps, instead of small steps. Often, resolutions fall by wayside because they were overambitious in the first place. If you’ve been writing in drips and drabbles over the past several months, it’s very hard to start writing two thousand words a day once January 1st rolls around. And if you’ve committed to some big daily goal, the first couple of times you miss it, you fall so far behind that it’s easy to give up altogether. Baby steps build habits.
As I’ve pondered what I want to change this next year, I realize that what I really need is intentionality–to prioritize all that I have in my life, and to focus my energies on the things that are most important to me. I need to eliminate the clutter in my life, and work on creating good habits that will carry me through Life Stuff and be such a part of my routine that I do them without even thinking about it.
I usually post about writing resolutions on this blog, but this year I’ve realized that I need to do other things first, which will prepare the soil for my writing to grow and flourish. So, while writing is on the list *grin*, you have to scroll down to get to it.
So this year, I resolve to focus on and build good habits in the following areas:
Prayer and meditation. Faith is the bedrock of my life. Going without talking to God and listening for Him every day is a recipe for a tired, drained and cranky me, with nothing to give to anyone or anything.
Exercise and healthy diet. Alas, my post-thirty body isn’t able to shed the fat as easily as my 20s body did. But more than just being able to fit into my old jeans again, I want to be healthy, fit, and have energy. So I can, you know, enjoy life and do the things I want to and that are good for me.
Watching five episodes of 24 in a row is probably not one of those things.
The “get healthier” plan consists of portion control, breaking the post-dinner snacking habit (*siiiiigh*), learning that I do not need to say “Yes” to very piece of dessert that bats its eyelashes at me, getting out for a brisk walk as often as I can (challenging, since like the groundhog, I’d prefer to hibernate all winter) and finding some sort of exercise video/class/magic pill/spell that works for me. Still working on the details for that last one.
My family. It might be funny to hear a homeschooling mom say this, but I want to focus on spending more time with my children. More time playing Bananagrams and Go Fish, reading non-school books, doing practical things together like cleaning up and folding laundry… things that don’t involve workbooks and index cards. My 3yo, the non-schooling child, would like some attention, too, in the mornings.
My patient husband also deserves more attention. And, no, watching 24 together doesn’t cut it.
Eliminate the time-wasters. Stuff that doesn’t get used, but that I still have to clean, pick up, put away. So-so books that aren’t more than mildly enjoyable. And the Internet, oh the Internet! Flame wars and train wrecks and rabbit trails and tangents and cool websites and an RSS feed a mile long and… and… So much of the time, I’m a spectator, not a participant. So when I’m online, I resolve to use my time learning and interacting.
Writing! Finally! I resolve to build good writing habits. 700 words a day is my goal when I’m working on a rough draft, otherwise I’ll spend time doing writing exercises, brainstorming, or revising. If I miss a day, I will not beat myself up or try to catch up; instead I’ll get back in the saddle. I’ve got a bunch of projects in the pipeline, and I’ve put the top few on Sticky Notes to keep them at the front of my mind. If I hit on a block on one story, I have other stories I can work on.
And I’m determined to be consistent with keeping up with this blog (I’m even taking a class to help me, eek). Plan is to post M-W-F.
Reading. More non-fiction and classics. I make this resolution every year. Someday it’ll stick. Perhaps. 😀
Additional reading:
Dean Wesley Smith on Life Happens, restarting, and failure.
Kristen Lamb on planning for success.
How about you? How do you maximize your chances for success?
I wish for you stick-at-ability, clear-headedness, and the ability to manage your time in ways which are beneficial to you and your family.
Inner peace, a healthy body, a close-knit family and enough time for personal interests would benefit us all. I’m interested by that ‘eliminate time-wasters. That is so what I need to do! That and to be more of a participant than an observer.
Have a good year!
Thanks, Prue! And same to you!
Oops, just saw your last sentence.
Last year I tried to identify one thing each day which had top priority (over and above routine things like cooking). If I did that, it usually got done.
I also put writing first – looked at how much time I had available for writing then sat down at the same time each day. It doesn’t always work but it works more than it did!
Identifying the appropriate time to do things helped – like exercising early morning helps wake me up. Exercise before lunch means I don’t want so much to eat. It’s no good sitting down to write first thing after breakfast – I just go back to sleep…and so on.
And finally, a flexible timetable helps. I fold a piece of A4 paper into 6 columns, one for each day (Sunday is a day off), and jot things down for each day. Thanks to Jo Myles for that suggestsion 🙂
Oh, I like the tip about figuring out when is the best time to do certain things. Nice list.
I’ve discovered that making my goals realistic, and achieving them sets a pattern for success. (This is right out of Holly Lisle’s classwork, and is like your giant leaps vs. small steps concept. 🙂 )
With that in mind there are some things that I would like to set as goals, such as finishing my revision -at least the second draft of it- but since I don’t know how much work will be involved for me, it might not be a realistic resolution.
So instead I plot my resolutions a bit more flexibly. For example, I’ve set my goal to finish the next lesson by the end of the month. Then, once I learn what is involved in the next one, I set that next goal. The little successes along the way make the journey such a pleasant one!
One thing I do want to do is let people see some of my writing. I did that yesterday when I put up my first chapter for critique. Scary, but incredibly useful! I am getting so much great feedback! I think that will be a resolution I can keep going on.
I love that you started your resolutions with a spiritual one. That is, after all, the foundation for all the rest.
Yes, a pattern of success is such a big boost, isn’t it? That’s something I should definitely look into.
Congratulations on putting your first chapter up for critique. It’s such a seemingly small thing, but it requires a lot of courage.
You have some awesome realistic goals, something I’ve been trying to get more of into my life. I especially love “My patient husband also deserves more attention. And, no, watching 24 together doesn’t cut it.” and “Eliminate the time-wasters. ” That last is such a huge one.
I think the biggest thing for maximizing my own chances is mindset. I have to resolve not to get overwhelmed and just keep putting one foot in front of the other. I discovered recently that I get a phenomenal quantity of words written just by writing in 1-8 minute sessions. Sure, I’d love to write for an hour, but it usually doesn’t happen. Usually I get 2 minutes in, and something or someone interrupts. But that’s okay. Those pennies add up—and quickly. It’s kind of just remembering for myself that every little bit I put in is worth it. And that helps me be willing to put in the little bits that will help me reach my goals.
I discovered recently that I get a phenomenal quantity of words written just by writing in 1-8 minute sessions. Sure, I’d love to write for an hour, but it usually doesn’t happen.
Agreed. I write in timed sessions of 10-20 minutes and that works out very well for me.